trapped

I really hate to use the above term in reference to how an animal might feel, but its sort of that "rat in a cage" feeling. Its not a good one which is probably why I despise making the connection between this physical and mental state of being, with something so precious as even a rodent.

I guess the feeling comes from my current situation of not having a job and relying on someone else for money. I've always worked and always had my own incoming flow of cash, no matter how small it might be, so it has been a difficult period of adjustment. With the disappearance of financial self-support, also goes any kind of freedom, hence the feeling of entrapment.

Not only can I not buy everything that I am used to, my traveling legs have been cut off. Buying something such as a $500 airline ticket that can carry me away half way around this earth is not even an option. In live money terms, that's a pretty good deal. You can't drive to the other end of this country and back for 500 bones let alone get on a plane and go to Europe. I should be jumping for joy and grabbing my debit card to purchase such a memory waiting to happen. Alas, no job, school only and no life. Even during the breaks I have during school...